I am more scared of the dark now than when I was a kid. The last couple weeks, I’ve been driving down to Orange County a lot for work, and the traffic has been awful! My GPS sends me on a scavenger hunt all around LA to places I’ve never even seen. And for some…
So very grateful that Stevie’s eye is healing and we can go back to the local wading pools. They’re a freakin’ life saver because it requires very little effort from me. I just have to make sure he doesn’t jump, splash, or run the entire time. Because those are like the easiest rules ever for kids to…
It seems that strange people are often drawn to me. I have the most interesting conversations while I’m out and about. If you’re someone who likes me, I’m sorry to break it to you, but you’re probably a weirdo. Luckily I like weirdos, so we’ll all get along great. My husband works so much, that anytime he…
This week kicked my ass all the way to Tallahassee and back. Actually, I would have enjoyed Tallahassee more. I really wanted to make a couple bracelets and anklets for summer just like I would have when I was 12. After 6 attempts to follow Pinterest instructions, I finally had to go to a children’s crafting…
If I lived anywhere else, I might think it was a little strange to see a full-on Transformer walking down the street. Stevie tells me he likes spiders a LOT. At which point I feel a tad… faint. I got goosed pretty good in the middle of night, and even in a drunken sleep stupor, it…
I cooked two whole times in one week. Miracles do happen folks. Stevie has an eye surgery coming up. The info packet and to-do list are sitting nicely on my desk, yet to be handled. Don’t wanna. I find it hugely gratifying when people who are jerks in a shopping center end up with a crummy…
My kid makes other kids cry because he won’t stop saying “hi” to them. For real. I stopped subscribing to magazines a couple years ago because it was turning into a “problem”. Luckily I have neighbors with the same “problem” and I just read their magazines when they’re done! This week I’ve been eating a lot…
You know you’re with a group of experienced moms when your son barfs at the lunch table and nobody even bats an eye. Stevie’s favorite phrases include, but are not limited to the following: Stevie farted! Stevie burped! Stevie farted on mom’s face! (What!!) And of course he says them all at the most embarrassing times.…
About 80% of the food and snacks I’m eating are “spicy”. At least that’s what I tell my son, so I don’t have to share. I have such limited time these days, it takes me 3 mornings to give myself a pedicure. One day to remove nail polish, one day to buff and tidy up…
I’m tempted to buy one of those hand-held tally counters and track how many times a day Stevie says “no”. I’m guessing it’s close to 40 gajillion. I’m super annoyed that the local pools don’t open until end of May. It’s been hot for 2 years straight! I need waaaater. And before you tell me…